Annual Break

October 20, 2009

I know I don’t write often enough to justify a break…but a break is in store.

…at least from this site.  

On Thursday, October 22, my family and I will load ourselves and 6 bags into a plane headed to Africa.  Each Fall we go to Uganda for a few weeks to work on behalf of the Children’s Heritage Foundation.

Please keep up with our travels and adventure at www.muwanguzi.blogspot.com

Thanks, 

and I’ll see you back here in  a month.


Read Today, Respond Tomorrow: Part 2

October 7, 2009

I parked the car and opened the door to get out and walk into the airport terminal when my son Perez yelled, “Dad, wait, we have to pray for your trip!”  So the 3 of us paused for a moment while Perez prayed, “God, help dad to have a good trip and for the airplane not to get on fire, amen.” 

45 minutes later, aboard the plane (in between the plane wall and the middle seat woman) I began thinking about the flight.  I have never once worried about flying, but for some reason I had concerns this time.  What if the plane did catch fire?  The thought of de-boarding briefly crossed my mind as the plane taxied and I drifted asleep.

I was grateful for my son’s cute prayer, waking up an hour and a half later at 39,000 feet to a major electrical storm. 

I don’t think we can live between beauty and terror for long.  We either ingore the tough things that are really going on, put on a facade and go about each day like things are great…or…we deal with our stuff.  The planes initial descent got me thinking about all of this stuff.  I knew we couldn’t fly at 39,000 feet forever, I knew we were not going any higher…what I knew was that we were going to fly right into the middle of the storm, that was our only choice to really get to where we needed to be.

This is what we need to do.  We need to “fly our planes” head on into the things we need to deal with, so we can get through them and get on with where we’d like to be (of course praying along with Perez that our lives don’t get on fire).  I of course have my own opinions on what “where we’d like to be” means but we don’t all have to agree on the destination (This is where my personal and church mission come to mind, Taking hold of and living out the way of Jesus)

One of the most helpful things to calm my nerves as we made our way into the thick clouds and flashing strikes, was that I knew I wasn’t going it alone.  130 other people were going through the storm with we, and I had faith that my life was in good hands of the SWA pilot.  We landes without incident, and it’s doubtful that anyone else on that plane is even talking of that flight now 6 days later.  Though the flight is over, I so strongly feel that many of us still need to go through our own personal storm. 

I want to invite you right now, right here on this blog as you’re reading, to begin your initial descent.  To pray.  And I’ll pray too.  To comment on this site at what ever level of disclosure you are comfortable with…and I want you to know, that you are not going it alone.  And you’ll make it.  And it will be good.  And it will be beautiful from every vantage point.


Read Today, Respond Tomorrow: part 1

October 6, 2009

Last Thursday I flew from San Diego to Chicago to attend a very good friends wedding.  It was a typical flight, most of it anyway.  Ten minutes behind schedule, a little turbulence and the usual Southwest comedy.  But.  And this is a big butt (oops, not that kind). 

About 1 hour out of Chicago, still flying at 39,000 feet, I experienced being caught in between.  Between excitement and exhaustion.  The plane wall and the well built woman in the middle seat.  And between terror and beauty. 

As we flew at 39,000 feet, the late night sky began to light up with lightning below us.  The clouds were thick and the lightning frequent, a powerful storm.  As I looked down at that storm, I wondered about the experience of the people below.  What was happening down there?  Then I looked up.

The most beautiful full moon.  Calm sky.  Stars.  I thought about how different the experience of the people below would be if they could see what I saw.  If they could get out of the storm and see clear skys.  I wondered how both conditions could exist at the same time, and why some of us get to experience the beauty, and others the storm.  Terrow below, beauty above and I was stuck in a plane in between.  

And then we began our initial descent into Chicago and into the storm.


Doing the same thing alone

September 18, 2009

I sat on the San Diego Convention Center stairs this evening catching my breath after some much needed exercise when my eyes landed on the Hilton Hotel.  As someone who blogs occasionally and speaks often, just about everything that crosses my eyes or ears gets me thinking (Never mind that its Friday night, and I’m out exercising and blogging).

This will come as no surprise, but when designers finish hotel rooms, they have a tendency to do them all the same.  Room, 301, 401, 501, 601, 701, 801…they are identical.  As my eyes made their way up the side of the hotel, I couldn’t help but notice that everyone had their TV on.  Because rooms are the same, and TV’s were on, the entire side of the hotel looked like the same thing, over and over and over again.  All the way up the hotel, I pictured people sitting on their hotel bed, watching TV…everybody doing the exact same thing, but doing it alone.

How often do we go through things in life, and feel like we go through them alone?  Nobody understands what I’m going through.  He wouldn’t get it.  She couldn’t relate.  They’re too busy.  Maybe we’re wrong.  Maybe others are above us and below us and beside us, doing or going through similar things and we just don’t know it.  Maybe from a distance someone is looking (down) on us, wondering why so many of us are experiencing similar things but doing it in the isolation of our own room.

So, maybe its time to check out of the hotel, and join the crowd.  There are others all around us that are…struggling with finances, discouraged in relationships, looking for work, over worked, loving work, hating work, celebrating birthdays, looking for friends, raising kids, having fun, hurting, and on and on… (is anyone putting their condo back together after a flood).  And even if you need a bit of time to yourself, go ahead and take it but don’t linger there long, cause life was never meant to look the Hilton Hotel.


Coffee stress

September 9, 2009

I hate that I still drink coffee.  I don’t like spending my money on it.  I don’t like how it makes me feel.  I don’t like how it makes me smell.  I don’t really even like the taste.  I just like the relaxing, relational, morning ritual.  Until now.

For the past couple of weeks I’ve been frequenting a new (to me) Starbucks because of its convenience.  Week 1 was fine.  I got to know the people who kept my addiction alive and they got to know me…so long as we define knowing me as knowing my name and what I drink.  It was a good week of coffee and I looked forward to week 2.

I walked into my new Starbucks on Monday, and I knew something was wrong.  The happy, laid back, trying to create a “come and stay awhile” feel was absent.  It was all business.  I wanted to know why.  What happened.  Then I saw them, 3 men in the corner.  With clipboards.  Stopwatches.  Red pens.  

It was a coffee audit.  

When I walked out the door, I was assigned the number 109.  I don’t know what that meant, but I prefer being called Steve, and yes, I’d like another caramel machiato.  

It was the same for 3 days.  No fun, high stress.  Just for something I’d rather quit, and now the one thing I actually enjoy about it, the ritual, has been marred.  It’s a business.  There’s a bottom line.  And there are people making sure you do it the way they want it done in the time and manner that they want it done.  When it comes to me, they just care that I keep coming back and spending my money on their product.  

I wonder if I do anything else, that I don’t really want to do, and isn’t all that its cracked up to be, that will only let me down when I see it for what it really is?  

When you drink your next cup of coffee, take a moment to think about what it is you live for.  And why.  That’s what I’ll be doing and I hope we’ll both find that it has more substance than water, beans and milk.


Back to school

September 8, 2009

Perez started first grade today.  A new school, new teacher, new everything…although he had a great day, it was pretty tough dropping the little guy off this morning and seeing the nervousness in his eyes.  All the new, all the changes, starting another year of school…well, it got me thinking.  As much as I will be having to encourage Perez to get out of bed, brush his teeth, get his uniform on, do his homework and so on, the least I can do is hold myself as accountable to this blog.  So as the kids go back to school, I return to writing.

I call this site the walk, but lately life has felt more like a sprint.  A flooded condo, part time job, leading the church, working on behalf of the children’s heritage foundation, preparing for our October trip to Uganda, being a dad, husband and friend and of course, trying to get on my bike…it’s been a hectic summer.  So getting back to blogging is not all I intend to restore in my daily rhythm, but I’ll have to say more about these things in future posts.

Rest.

I crashed today.  I got home from work just about 1pm completely exhausted.  I walked inside, took some advil and fell fast asleep on the couch for over an hour (I never nap, and I NEVER fall asleep quickly).  It doesn’t matter how much I have to do, or how busy I am, if I don’t take care of myself, including a day of rest…a sabbath day, then eventually I will crash…again.  I don’t think I can find an entire day to give to sabbath rest, but I’m going to find a “big” chunk of time beginning this week.  

I don’t know anyone who is bored.  Most everyone I know is busy.  Busy and tired.  If this includes you, I hope you’ll find a way with me to set aside some of your precious time for you, to rest.  And if you’ve got any great ideas on how to get this done, including rest into our crazy schedules, let me know.


Does it matter?

July 28, 2009

How important is being loyal, faithful to your promises, following through with your commitments?  Of course its important, but is it really?

One of my son’s favorite books is, “Horton hatches the egg.”  Without going into the story (and its a good one, so get the book) the phrase, “I meant what I said and I said what I meant…an elephant is faithful 100%” repeats several times throughout the book.  And I can’t get it out of my head.

I’m a fairly loyal guy, but 100%?  

I have been getting my haircut from the same place since I moved to San Diego, but a couple of weeks ago they couldn’t get me in so I went somewhere else.  Then, days later, another place near my house opened and they are offering half price haircuts.  I already felt bad enough that I went somewhere else once, but being tempted to try yet another place just because it was cheaper…I am starting to feel dirty.  

Work is underway on my condo after the “big” flood.  Contractors are not showing up when they said.  Agreements are being re-negotiated.  Things are not being done as discussed.  All I’ve asked is to simply tell me what you are going to do and stick to it.

Today I told a friend that he could borrow my motorcycle for a 5 day road trip.  I told another guy that my wife and I would be honored to help lead a major division of the non-profit organization that he runs.  I set a tentative date for our fall trip to Uganda and I contacted a homeless advocacy organization offering some help.  Ask these people if faithfulness matters.  

Of course loyalty matters.  Not just believing it matters, but living like it does…all of the time.  No excuses…a better price, nicer facility, prettier girl, more convenient…these sort of things shouldn’t matter, they shouldn’t but they often do.

so.  

So here’s the question.  Is there a time, or a reason, to break our loyalties or our commitments?  What do you think?


spare time

July 22, 2009

The Tour de France has brought my blogging to a halt. But with just 4 days of racing left, I will soon turn off Versus (cable channel airing the tour) and return to wordpress and writing.  Until then, I don’t care what the headlines read…Go Lance!

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Obligations

July 14, 2009

I am somewhat involved in work related to helping people who live in poverty.  Food and water, health care, education and economic development are the things that really seem to matter and they’re what my wife and I give our time to.  

Because I care of such things, I have been reading different books about philanthropy and charity…they are having a profound influence upon me, especially “the life you can save” by Peter Singer.  Here’s how it begins:

On your way to work, you pass by a small pond.  On hot days, children sometimes play in the pond, which is only knee-deep.  The weather’s cool today, though, and the hour is early, so you are surprised to see a child splashing about in the pond.  As you get closer, you see that it is a very young child, just a toddler, who is flailing about, unable to stay upright or walk out of the pond.  You look for the parents or babysitter, but there is no one else around.  If you don’t wade in and pull him out, he seems likely to drown.  Wading in is safe and easy, but you will ruin the new shoes you just bought and get your suit wet and muddy.  By the time you hand over the child to someone responsible for him, and change your clothes, you’ll be late for work.  What should you do?

Of course we save the child.  How could anyone consider a pair of shoes, or missing an hour or two of work, a good reason for not saving a child’s life?

I nodded through these first pages in agreement, but the impact, or perhaps implication, came on the following pages from statements like this:

According to a study conducted by UNICEF, nearly 10 million children under five years old die each year from causes related to poverty.

As far as I’m concerned, everyone capable of logging on to read this also has an obligation to “wade in” and save a child’s life.  Prompted by the pages of Singers book, it just seems wrong that I buy bottled water when I can get it from the tap.  That I waste money on coffee.  That I throw away food that I cannot eat (or don’t want to eat).  

As unthinkable as it is for the man in his suit to walk by the drowning child and not help, how can each of us go on and not also do something.  We must.

What do you think?


Impacting Excerpt?

July 11, 2009

From Crazy Love by Francis Chan:

We need to stop giving people excuses not to believe in God.  You’ve probably heard the expression “I believe in God, just not organized religion.”  I don’t think people would say that if the church truly lived like we are called to live.  The expression would change to “I can’t deny what the church does, but I don’t believe in their God.”  At least then they’d address their rejection of God rather than use the church as a scapegoat.

Hold on a minute.  Before clicking off this blog and moving on to your next task would you spend a minute thinking on this excerpt.  From whatever your angle (a Christian, skeptic, one that detests organized religion, one that rejects God etc), how do you react to this quote?  Does it have any impact?